Sharing My Heart

A few days ago, I was asked to give my testimony on camera. Since I am kinda a member of the team here, they wanted it to go with the rest of the team's testimonies on their website. I prayed about it, and all the circumstances kept pointing to it. I knew God wanted me to do this, but I was bucking, hard.

First of all, I have never successfully been on camera, I am certain God does not have acting in my future, as I am horrible in front of any recording device. Second of all, I have never successfully done any public speaking. I stink at that too. And thirdly, I can only think of 2 maybe 3 people outside my family that know my testimony. I kind of keep it a secret. Yeah, I have grown up in a strong Christian home and some people think that means I have no scars, or past hurt. That is totally wrong. In fact it hasn't been until this year that I have healed completely. Anyways, I was extremely reluctant to share any part of my heart for the whole world to see. But then God spoke to me, and I imagined a girl who had gone through the same junk as I have, but still has not healed. She sees my video testimony and God uses it as a tool to work in her life.

Ok, so I gave into God's will. It was hard for me to do. It didn't help that I needed to dress up in trendy clothes, get my hair done different, and have huge amounts of makeup put on my face. When it came time to shoot, I was so nervous. And I mean, like I am going to pass out nervous. But of course I have no such luck. Thank the Lord for the amazing people around me. Tim and Courtney prayed over me, and Stacia instructed me in some martial arts moves to loosen up. I was then set on a backless stool and we all laughed when I sang a ridiculous song to unclench my vocal chords.

I told my story, and I am so glad I obeyed the Lord. Even if it meant me sharing a part of my heart that I never did for anyone but my very closest friends and mentors. I actually have a good feeling about it, like it will make a difference in some small way. I don't know how, but I do know God had me do it for a reason, and I am content with that.

-Victoria